Day One with Jordan Catalano

So, Jordan Catalano arrived on schedule yesterday.  Twenty-four hours in, it sort of feels like I've got a hangover from drinking mudslides at TGIFridays (meaning, that the vodka and non-dairy supplements in my system are currently duking it out to see who will take me home at the end of the night).

Focus on the Shiny Things

Michael was an awesome Jordan Catalano buddy.  For those who have never been before, the waiting room to get chemo is sort of like the most intense bus stop ever.  At one point, I was noticing a man a few years older than me sitting just across the room who had such a sad look on his face.  He was sitting all by himself, which seemed like the saddest thing ever.  Then his visibly pregnant wife came and sat down next to him.  At this point, Michael suggested that I stop looking around the room and think about disco balls.  


After much waiting, blood tests, weight and height checks (I'm up to 168 pounds, 5'11, 31 inch waist, and have great blood pressure -- picture of health if it wasn't for the whole cancer thing), they walked us to Club Chemo.  It's a peppy little place.  Chemo was delivered through an IV, after I'd had an hour's worth of anti-nausea and steroids pumped in (incidentally, I'm also doing some weight lifting while I've got the steroids in me).  


A nice lady brought me an egg salad sandwich and some ginger ale.  Michael went and got lunch for himself (the nice lady said food is only for the patients - so she had a bit of an edge), and also brought me a cookie and fruit cup.  When I dropped a grape from the fruit cup, he grabbed it before I had time to reach for it.  Answering the question before I could even get the words out, he said, "No.  The five second rule does not apply here."  


Zipcar was also unexpectedly awesome.  The procedure took about 90 minutes longer than originally planned.  The car I'd booked had someone reserved after me, so I called, and sheepishly told the customer service rep: "Heyyyyy, so I'm having chemo for the first time today and they said it would only take 30 minutes, but it's actually a bit longer."  Two minutes later, they gave me a two hour (note: one time only) extension.  They also made me a life long customer.


We got home, and my sister Colleen was waiting for us.  She'd bought a new blu ray player from my parents, set it up, and had Bridesmaids playing when we walked in.  Awesome.  Admittedly, the bathroom scene at the dress shop was a little nauseating three hours after picking up Jordan Catalano, but whatever.  


Colleen and I have since also watched most of Arrested Development season one (I know that I'm the last person in the free world to watch it, but these people are hilarious, and watching a show about a highly dysfunctional family with my sister feels homey).  We also watched Scott Pilgrim Against the World this afternoon when it came on HBO, which turned out to be hilarious...Michael Sera seems to be having a moment on Harvard Street this week.

The Home Stretch

Chemo is on Tuesday morning.  I go in at 11:30 for some blood tests and to meet with my oncologist, and then they'll put me in the chair.  It'll be a single strong dose through an IV, the actual treatment should take about 30 minutes.  Here are answers, as best I can give them, to the most commonly asked questions:


How are you doing?
Fine.  Frequently fine.  Fine is the most appropriate answer.  Sometimes, in addition to being fine, or instead of being fine, I'm also a little scared and occasionally burst into tears at funny moments.  (Most notably, this happened on my flight home from California...I put my sunglasses on and pulled my hoody up, and then realized I looked like a gay, crying Unabomber). But generally, I really am fine. 


What are you naming your Chemo?

After much consideration, I have decided to name my chemo Jordan Catalano.  For those of you who weren't teenaged girls/gay in the early 90's, JC was the hot, angsty, vaguely bad-boy with a heart of gold love interest of Angela Chase on My So Called Life.  Like most teenaged heart throbs, JC's time has long since passed, but I like the idea of spending a couple of weeks knocked back on the couch with him before he's sent packing for good, so here we are.



Who's going with you?
Once again, Michael is taking some time off of work to get me to and from the hospital.  He had blocked the day on his calendar before I even asked...and when I said, "I didn't want to assume --" he cut me off and said: "ASSUME."  He's one helluva good egg. 



Will you lose your hair?

Shhhhugaaaaahhhhh Plummmmmmm!

I am hoping that Jordan Catalano will not make me lose my hair - but really, we just dunno.  Some people do, some people don't.  Typically, people who do lose their hair find then when it grows back it's thicker and curlier.  If this happens to me, I'm thinking of rocking a Macy Gray style for fall 2012.


Then what happens?
My awesome sister, Colleen is flying in from Chicago on Tuesday morning, so when we get back from the hospital, she'll be here to hang out and watch bad tv with me for the first week.  By the time she goes home, we'll probably have a better idea of how well I'll be tolerating my time with Jordan Catalano.  While she's here we will watch a lot of bad TV, and trash talk Jordan Catalano.


Do you need anything?
The near-constant offers for food, drinks, hanging out, and Jordan Catalano sitting are wonderful and much appreciated -- but for right now, I'm good, and I promise I'll be proactive about asking for help as I need it.  Since we don't really know how I'm going to react to Jordan Catalano (he used to make me kinda tingly and sweaty), it's hard to anticipate right now what I'll need as the next coupla weeks go by.  Owen Ryan and Jeff White have been particularly fastidious about emailing me links to shirtless Olympians and things like that - which is both uplifting, and helps to make Jordan Catalano a little jealous (hot).


And finally...
My hope, and belief, is that my date on Tuesday with Jordan Catalano will be the beginning of the end of this journey.  After Jordan Catalano has left, the chances of a recurrence are less than 7%.  I'm excited to get passed this moment of anticipating what's to come, and instead start focusing on get recovered and well and hugging and thanking so many of you who have helped in big and small ways on the road.  


In the meantime, please high-five the closest person in proximity to you (because high fives are the best juju out there) and try and be kind to all the people you meet, because you never know what might be growing inside their pants (this is one of the many strange lessons I have learned from Leftee and Jordan Catalano).  


MWAH.